Work has been stressful the past few months. And now, some things are happening in the office which is just making me feel uncomfortable. My boss has lost trust in me, for God knows what reason (even his wife doesn't know why!) and it is hard for me. I don't like and don't feel comfortable to work in an environment like this - its hard for me because now I keep second guessing myself and keep trying to figure out what it is I did to make my boss not trust me. The reason he gave was due to an ex-mgmt staff who lied to us and left us a small mess, so now he finds it hard to trust all management team members. But I find that hard to accept because 1) it wasn't that big of an issue to cause this reaction, 2) that guy was with the company for 1 year and I have been here for almost 4 years!, 3) I have never done anything to give reason to distrust me.
It is frustrating for me. I know I shouldnt be focusing on the negative and just do my work but it isn't easy. I used to feel like a part of the family at the office, but now I just don't feel comfortable anymore... it is very sad.
And of course there is the stress of my studies. I am doing Comparative Law and Team Leadership this semester. I have one leadership assignment due this Friday, the Law online test due on Tuesday, 3 law essays to finish by mid October and another 2 leadership assignments due in 2 weeks and in one month respectively!!! Yikes!!
Then... yes there is more!!! My back is giving me trouble again!!! EEEEEEE!!! I cant exercise - Well I didnt for 6 weeks but on Sunday and yesterday i just went on the treadmill for half an hour. I could only walk, not jog or run but the pain does intensify after so I can't do it everyday. This is so irritating! Just walking from my office to Subway (which is a 3 or 4 min walk) really flared up the pain. This is annoying.
My health - I took the blood and urine tests last weekend and also did ultrasounds and an ECG. The test results I will get this weekend. The ECG was fine. The ultrasound had a bit of concern so I will know more with the blood test results.
I need to destress!!
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Monday, August 10, 2009
Unbelievable
It is just hard to comprehend... Kireen is dead. How can this be?
Kireen is my moms cousin. From what I can gather, she drove to Ipoh where her mom lives, she said she feels funny and then she suddenly collapsed. They rushed her to the hospital.
We got the call earlier that she was in ICU and on life support and just a short while ago, we got the news that she has gone home to be with the Lord.
It really is a shock. She was fine. She wasn't sick. She is still young. Only in her 40s. Her son Joseph is like only 6 years old I think.
I just don't know what to say....
Kireen is my moms cousin. From what I can gather, she drove to Ipoh where her mom lives, she said she feels funny and then she suddenly collapsed. They rushed her to the hospital.
We got the call earlier that she was in ICU and on life support and just a short while ago, we got the news that she has gone home to be with the Lord.
It really is a shock. She was fine. She wasn't sick. She is still young. Only in her 40s. Her son Joseph is like only 6 years old I think.
I just don't know what to say....
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Finally!
It has been awhile since I have blogged. I have been busy but then I guess that is just an excuse!
Anyways, updates. I finally went to church on Sunday! It has been more than 5 months!
I have been at a cross road. Should I go back to Grace or should I move to CHC? I knew in my heart that I didn't want to go to CHC and after checking myself and praying, I finally had the peace in my decision to go back to Grace. After all, I didn't have problems there.
It's time for me to stop backsliding and get my spiritual life back on track. Yes I have said that many times but I have to really do it!
Ivan and I went for a prayer meeting yesterday at Dataran Prima. It is done by a Nigerian pastor, Pastor Samson Dabas. Sometimes I had difficulty understanding his accent but the session was great. The anointing was really powerful in the air and I felt charged and uplifted. Even though we were there at 7pm and left at 11pm, it was worth it. And even though I had to get up very early this morning for bootcamp, I wasn't tired!
So talking about bootcamp. It is great. I mean it is torturous but it is good exercise for me, and God knows I need the exercise. They are having a graduation drinks thingy this Saturday at Souled Out. Rayna and Ivan are coming with me. It should be interesting.
I am also enjoying kickboxing. Of course there is still the lazy part of me fighting against it - this is something that I have to overcome.
Work sucks! Honestly! I don't know. I don't know if i'm just tired of this job, or just frustrated with the issues or maybe just tired of working altogether!! haha how I wish I could strike a multi million dollar lottery and quit working!
I have started another blog www.strugglinghippo.blogspot.com This blog is to talk on issues with regards to weight, and give tips on health and exercise.
I hope it encourages people.
Anyways, updates. I finally went to church on Sunday! It has been more than 5 months!
I have been at a cross road. Should I go back to Grace or should I move to CHC? I knew in my heart that I didn't want to go to CHC and after checking myself and praying, I finally had the peace in my decision to go back to Grace. After all, I didn't have problems there.
It's time for me to stop backsliding and get my spiritual life back on track. Yes I have said that many times but I have to really do it!
Ivan and I went for a prayer meeting yesterday at Dataran Prima. It is done by a Nigerian pastor, Pastor Samson Dabas. Sometimes I had difficulty understanding his accent but the session was great. The anointing was really powerful in the air and I felt charged and uplifted. Even though we were there at 7pm and left at 11pm, it was worth it. And even though I had to get up very early this morning for bootcamp, I wasn't tired!
So talking about bootcamp. It is great. I mean it is torturous but it is good exercise for me, and God knows I need the exercise. They are having a graduation drinks thingy this Saturday at Souled Out. Rayna and Ivan are coming with me. It should be interesting.
I am also enjoying kickboxing. Of course there is still the lazy part of me fighting against it - this is something that I have to overcome.
Work sucks! Honestly! I don't know. I don't know if i'm just tired of this job, or just frustrated with the issues or maybe just tired of working altogether!! haha how I wish I could strike a multi million dollar lottery and quit working!
I have started another blog www.strugglinghippo.blogspot.com This blog is to talk on issues with regards to weight, and give tips on health and exercise.
I hope it encourages people.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
A challenge
I lost weight!! 1.7kg this week. I am happy :-) I guess adding the exercise after so long made a difference. But not enough cms lost so have to work on that.
The economy is challenging and I am definitely being affected in not a good way. But I just have to keep remembering that I am a faithful tither and I am a child of God, and no circumstances can bring me down and whatever happens to the world will not affect me as long as I hold on to my faith in God and leave all things in his hands.
I just got to keep reminding myself of that and just keep praying for the Strenght to fight all the doubts and fear and worrying that comes to my mind so easily.
I will prosper and I will rise up!
AMEN!
The economy is challenging and I am definitely being affected in not a good way. But I just have to keep remembering that I am a faithful tither and I am a child of God, and no circumstances can bring me down and whatever happens to the world will not affect me as long as I hold on to my faith in God and leave all things in his hands.
I just got to keep reminding myself of that and just keep praying for the Strenght to fight all the doubts and fear and worrying that comes to my mind so easily.
I will prosper and I will rise up!
AMEN!
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Be positive
I am going to be positive and put all my efforts into my work, my diet and exercise and God this week. I am not going to let anything get me down and I am going to do my level best to be a motivator, an educator and a friend.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
take it slow
I have been overdoing it with my movements and trying to exercise... today I was sitting on the couch and suddenly i had really sharp pain shooting from my lower back down my thighs. It was so painful and I couldnt move for awhile.
I know its my fault. I have to take it slow with the exercise even though I desperately want to lose weight faster. So i just need to slow down and be more careful. I don't want to end up suffering the way I did last month... I can't afford any more time away from work or not being able to do much...
I know its my fault. I have to take it slow with the exercise even though I desperately want to lose weight faster. So i just need to slow down and be more careful. I don't want to end up suffering the way I did last month... I can't afford any more time away from work or not being able to do much...
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Weight
Shirley came today. I only lost 0.8kg... and I hardly lost cms either!! i feel lousy !!!!! eeeeee!! My current weight is 95.7kg.
How am i going to achieve my first goal of being 89kg by June 20th at this rate? That means I have 6.7kg to go in 6 weeks.
It really sucks.. but I know that I cannot let that allow me to slip.
Today we went for a farewell lunch as it is Tracy's last day. I had grilled fish with white sauce and steamed vegetables and plain black tea. I didnt have breakfast. I will be having my TCD soup for dinner.
Lorraine lost about 2 kgs! I am so happy of her. She has been working really hard and the results are showing. It's great. She had the same meal as me and after lunch the two of us and Mawar walked up the 3 floors to the office...
I am definitely going to go on the treadmill when I go home.. Need to go down to at least 94.5kg by next week. So that means more discipline!
Work sucks. So many issues with the Philippines office - I'm so pissed off with the people there. I'm getting tired with the non-stop issues that keep arising both in the KL and Philippines office. In the KL office its all about immature, childish, people with non stop politics. I am so sick of it! Why can't people just come to work, do their jobs and go home? EEEEEEeeeee
I so need to be financially independent so that I can become a full time house wife or maybe get a job where I can work from home. That would be great!
How am i going to achieve my first goal of being 89kg by June 20th at this rate? That means I have 6.7kg to go in 6 weeks.
It really sucks.. but I know that I cannot let that allow me to slip.
Today we went for a farewell lunch as it is Tracy's last day. I had grilled fish with white sauce and steamed vegetables and plain black tea. I didnt have breakfast. I will be having my TCD soup for dinner.
Lorraine lost about 2 kgs! I am so happy of her. She has been working really hard and the results are showing. It's great. She had the same meal as me and after lunch the two of us and Mawar walked up the 3 floors to the office...
I am definitely going to go on the treadmill when I go home.. Need to go down to at least 94.5kg by next week. So that means more discipline!
Work sucks. So many issues with the Philippines office - I'm so pissed off with the people there. I'm getting tired with the non-stop issues that keep arising both in the KL and Philippines office. In the KL office its all about immature, childish, people with non stop politics. I am so sick of it! Why can't people just come to work, do their jobs and go home? EEEEEEeeeee
I so need to be financially independent so that I can become a full time house wife or maybe get a job where I can work from home. That would be great!
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